Feedback from Fi -Pt 2

The second round of tales from my tot. Again…Completely fictional. But she is 100% as dramatic.  

When mom says no…. 

“Boys only want love if it’s torture”👸🏼

Sadly… Based on a true story. 

Mom: 1     Fi: 0

… When BET is on and the remote is hiding … 

(Look out for a video introducing “Mellie” coming soon)

Sorry it’s been so long (like a week. Long in my mind)
This week has been swamped. I’ll save you the mind numbing details and just give you a photo recap

We went to the beach

After hanging out in the mountains…

Stumbled across some great finds in a recipe book from Ollies (full review coming soon)

Got an awesome “beat” from southern md based make up artist Kris James (full detail and photos coming soon)

Tried some new protective hair styling (peep the wrap). Mixed reviews (mixed between sweet and racist as hell
I have posts in the que for this week so stay connected by following our fb page, Instagram, and now Pinterest. There are usually discounts and freebies I post all around that don’t fit in my blog posts. 

Love to the world,



(blank) Girl Magic

I was going to start this week with a post about how I am not registered to vote and why but you will have to wait for that thriller.

I changed it up because I had an interesting conversation with my two year old daughter. If you have not noticed Fi is mixed with black and white. I could not tell you much more than that… call me ignorant but I am not I am black and her father is white.

I knew there would be a day where I would need to explain the complexities of life to her but I just wanted her to continue to think people are all the same for as long as possible… again call me ignorant but who am I to destroy the innocence of a child?


So yesterday we were in the mirror (like always) and with a gasp she exclaimed, “mama! I am WHITE!”

In my head I am like “girl I know!”… I mean she was born very fair skinned with bright blue eyes (like most babies…I thought) While her eyes have transformed to a light brown her skin has stayed pretty light.  But anyways… before I could address her comment she rubs my arm and says “mama you are brown and I love your brown skin it is very pretty… and I am pretty too, I am beautiful mama”… Who are you ?! How are you so perfect? She said everything I was thinking! How did she beat me at this parenting thing? I have never gone out of my way to address her skin color with her. I seem to tell her every day she is beautiful… not ONLY because of her looks, because of her mind…because of the things she says without instruction.

I know as a mother it is up to me in a lot of ways to set the example of acceptance and beauty. It is up to me to teach her to love herself and to value her mind as much as she values how she looks.

I have a pretty wide range of what I think is beautiful because I try to see beauty in all things.  In every freckle and every stretchmark.

I have stretch marks from my thighs to the tops of my hips. I have scars from the hip piercings I got in high school. I have an outtie belly button that now sags from my pregnancy. I have a scars all over… from being a reckless child. I have bags under my eyes down to my chin. I have giant feet and a tiny booty.

All of those things are BEAUTIFUL to me…

I love myself.. have I always? No! But luckily college helped me figure out who I am and love that person while becoming a mother and seeing my body transform so drastically has made me love every inch of myself.

In the same regard… I love makeup I love weaves and wigs I love high heels. So how do I teach my little girl to love herself first… and if she chooses to try things like wearing makeup or heels or 30inch weave… it is COMPLIMENT her looks and who she is and not to make her someone else..?

Call me crazy but I want to raise my daughter to love who she is and not who she can be.

Everyone is beautiful. I want her to look in the mirror and see that. I want her to look out the window and see that. Even though I feel like all my love could take over the world, it is nothing if you do not love yourself.

I feel like it is damn near impossible to explain self love when she watches me pack on makeup for an hour every morning, squeeze into my waist trainer and straighten up my wig or weave or whatever mess is on my head.

Just being real…ish

She has not asked WHY I do this.. yet..

she just asks if she can join me.

I have been bullied about everything from my head to my toes…which at 14 sucked but at 22 you can’t tell me a damn thing about what I look like or who I am!

…But you see…


My daughter has the most beautiful curls– But someone somewhere might call them “nappy”


And she has perfect brown eyes — But she might constantly hear they are “just brown”


She has a flawless complexion but some might call her “pasty”


I know I cannot carry her through middle and high school reminding her that she is beautiful inside and out.

Can I convince her she does not need to be a certain size, shape, or color to be loved?

Can I convince her that she does not need to be loved by everyone?

I know every year she is going to see more, learn more, and love more.

In a world where you can buy everything you need to become an entirely different person… will she choose to love and be who she is on the inside?

It may take her 22 years to see that looks do not define beauty, actions do.

But honestly, do you wake up everyday and say “I am beautiful”?  Are you proud of who you are inside and out?

You should be….


Some of the products I use on Fi’s hair and skin (that I would swear by):

Aveeno Baby Daily Moisture Lotion – Fragrance Free – 18 oz • Aveeno • $5.49–28.99

SheaMoisture Curl & Shine Conditioner, Coconut & Hibiscus • Shea Moisture • $3.59

SheaMoisture Coconut & Hibiscus Curl Enhancing Smoothie • Shea Moisture • $9.99

Feedback from Fi

I have seen things like this before. My favorite is texts from mittens. Mostly because it’s hilarious but also because everyone has an inner voice for their pets or babies. Whenever I tell stories about Fi at work it sounds like I’m Mariah Carey’s personal assistant. So on a sleepless night I recalled a few conversations between the two of us…. Obviously in real life she may not be as articulate but other than that it’s pretty much word for word. Enjoy. 

At this point…. Do I ever need to explain my tardiness?

I wouldn’t call this lying … More so logic for my sanity. #momlogic

The cold shoulder never bothered me anyway…

I cannot afford TWO makeup addictions.



It’s a special day. To celebrate or remember the woman who raised you.
As a mom, there’s no particular day that a “thank you mom” means anymore than it does on a normal day. It’s my third Mother’s Day and it was just another normal day for fi and I. Not to sound corny but my daughters birthday is my “Mother’s Day”.

Today I am reflecting on how my “Mother’s Day” has changed me.
My two year old has been screaming “happy muddas day” all week (something she picked up at daycare I am sure) but I just  smile and say thank you. At two, there’s no way for her to understand that she doesn’t need to praise me for doing what a parent should do. Is being a single parent hard? Hell yeah. But even if there were 25 of me… There’s no need to thank us for putting food on the table. A happy safe healthy child makes me a happy mother every day. To be honest, if no one recognized me on this one day of the year, it wouldn’t stop me from being the best mudda I can be every other day of the year.
Today, I have been thinking about the past three years that I have been blessed with this gift and I have come up with:
Three reasons for the third year of happy muddas life….

1.) growth. Sit tight, it’s about to get really real.
I’ve grown so much since the morning in March of 2014 that I became a mother. I grow more each day. I have to… Fi gets bigger and smarter each day she challenges me each day to grow with her. As with any toddler, no two days are the same. My patience has grown. Along with love for learning and trying new things. I’ve grown to realize that being independent doesn’t mean you can’t ask for help. Grown to realize that I am the only thing that can stop me. Grown to appreciate the little things and wasting hours laying around cuddling. Experiencing each day with a reset attitude ready to explore. That makes me a maturing mother.

2.) inspiration. I am truly inspired by my daughter. It is the innocence and true wonder behind her 1000 questions and the look in her eyes when she learns something new. I never want her to lose that. She will inspire others the way she has inspired me. I’ve been inspired to keep learning. Inspired to challenge the routine. Inspired to change our lives.  Seeing someone who truly, I mean whole heartedly, loves, appreciates, and admires you…should make you want to be better than the best you. That makes me a determined mother.

FullSizeRender (2)
3.) love. Deeper than the hallmark cards. Living with true forgiveness in your heart. Opening up to appreciate all the beauty and good in what could be a truly cruel world. My child sees the world through me. She learns to love and hate through what she retains from my actions. When my daughter was born I knew I had to let go of all of the hate in my heart so my child had the chance to experience an amazing world. She may get her heartbroken one day. She may get her feelings hurt. She may be discriminated against or judged. But my hope as a mother is that the love that she has to give the world and the positive experiences that she has gained from being open and accepting of all people and opportunities will overshadow any negativity she may encounter. My hope is that she will be able to forgive those cannot love as deeply as she can. I want my child to be knowledgeable but not burdened by history. I hope that knowing how ugly the world can be will compel her to be even more open and accepting. The opportunity to give this little lady my heart and watch her run out into the world with it, makes me LOVE being a mother.

FullSizeRender (4)


Today reminded again how much I have to smile about. Even on the rainiest day I am just so happy and full of love when I hear “mama” from the next room in the morning.
The true gift for me is all that I have gained from being a mother. Being able to give life to a little person who will change lives.
Happy Mother’s Day